Published on September 14th, 2013 | by Flipside0
17th place position new excuse for university to be lazy
University officials cheered this morning as Edinburgh finally regained ‘Top 20’ status in the world according to the QS Rankings, the most prestigious and CORRECT, definitely CORRECT and TRUE, university rankings system in the world. With a top 20 spot secured, University management can now return to their default setting of being incredibly lazy and passive aggressive towards students.
All initiatives to improves student satisfaction and university experience that cost money have been dropped in order to fund a year-long bender for University staff. We attempted to contact Vice-Chancellor Sir Timothy O’Shea for comment, but he was already totally pissed.
Hugh Murdoch, President of Edinburgh University Students’ Union, said he was disappointed by the whole outcome. “I almost wish we’d fallen out of the QS rankings. Sure, it’s terrible when students apply for jobs, but it means the University look like shit-munchers and I get to look like a hero!” Lacking a heroic undertaking for him to involve himself in, Hugh returned to bothering Freshers who had no idea who he was or what his job involves.