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Commentary

Published on February 4th, 2017 | by Flipside

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2010/11 Socialist Society President Joins Conservative Party

The former president of Edinburgh University Socialist Society (SocSoc) has completed the inevitable today, and officially joined the Conservative Party.

In a move that has surprised absolutely nobody, Sandy Ashington-Clinton, 28, successfully sent off his membership application to the Tories this afternoon.

Ashington-Clinton, who was awarded a place on Deloitte’s graduate scheme last year, was a prominent left-wing activist during his time studying Politics and Philosophy at Edinburgh between 2007 and 2011, but since leaving, has gradually between parties across the political spectrum, before finally reaching the Conservatives.

The trainee accountant from Surrey was originally a member of the Scottish Green Party upon graduation in 2011, but began to receive criticism for “hypocrisy” off his peers after racking up 40,000 air miles during a year travelling in East Asia.

He bit the bullet and joined the Labour party in 2013, telling friends that on entering the real world, he accepted they were the only left wing party with a “real chance” of getting elected.

The natural charm of Tim Farron meant a switch to the Liberal Democrats in 2015 was too alluring, and the move to the Tories – whom he repeatedly branded “scum of the earth” during his failed campaign to be a sabbatical officer in 2009 – followed.

Speaking to Flipside, Ashington-Clinton said: “I think when you get older, you realise that socialism is great in theory but never works in practice”, to which our reporter reacted with an audible groan.

Forecasts suggest Ashington-Clinton will become an open racist and join UKIP in around 2040.

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