Alex Salmond to substitute Scottish police with Twitter
November 28th, 2013 | by Flipside
Alex Salmond has come under severe criticism for his police reform policies, which intend to replace Scottish police stations with […]
SK8R LIFE INSURANCE (SK8) ✖ STOCK SUSPENDED
EDINBURGH UNIVERSITY STUDENTS ASSOCIATION (EUSA) ▼-2005.21
ALEX SALMOND’S HAIR ▼ 230.067
CONSERVATIVE & UNIONIST NATIONAL TWEED CO (CUNT) ▲69.99
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BEDLAM THEATRE GROUP (BT) ▲ 5.74
EDINBURGH UNIVERSITY CREDIBILITY (UC) ▼ 1.000567
PETER HIGG’S SWAG ($G) ▲∞
BOTECO (BOT) ▲ 456.34
AVERAGE AGE IN TEVIOT (OLD) ▲ 67.45
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MILEY CYRUS EDINBURGH FAN CLUB (TWERK)▲ 42.67
DIRECTION OF NOSES UPON MENTION OF EDINBURGH NAPIER (NOZ) ▲ 90.00
EXAM PERFORMANCE IN MCEWAN HALL (STARE) ▼ 11.000567
TEVIOT CHIPS (SHIT)▼ 56.23
Monthly Archives: November 2013
Top Gear agrees to postpone nuclear ambitions at Geneva talks
November 28th, 2013 | by Flipside
BREAKING NEWS: First step taken towards peace among Sunday evening light entertainment shows Diplomats in Geneva celebrated a major breakthrough […]
Somali pirates arrested for impersonating Edinburgh students
November 26th, 2013 | by Flipside
BREAKING NEWS – The Somali government has revealed that two pirates are being detained in custody after attempting to impersonate […]
‘EUSA is a unicorn’ – unnamed students begin proposing a spree of ridiculous motions to the student council
November 25th, 2013 | by Flipside
In the wake of the recent ‘EUSA is a feminist’ policy, passed by the student council last Thursday, a group […]
Mehdi ‘can’t be bothered’ to end Block-Booking
November 23rd, 2013 | by Flipside
Flipside can report that Nadia Mehdi, the Edinburgh University Students Association Vice President of Societies and Activities, has decided she […]
The Student uses eugenics for superior journalism
November 22nd, 2013 | by Flipside
BREAKING – Flipside can exclusively reveal that The Student has secretly used eugenics to create superior journalism. Tyler Durden, spokesman […]
Compulsory light-bulb changing lessons introduced for all female Edinburgh students
November 21st, 2013 | by Flipside
As a direct result of The Student’s shocking revelations of female incompetence last month, a university spokesperson has announced that […]
EUSA exposed as animal slaying cult
November 20th, 2013 | by Flipside
Following the shocking announcement that Edinburgh University kills the most animals of any UK university, it has turned out that […]
Prime Ministers living and dead to reunite for Doctor Who anniversary
November 20th, 2013 | by Flipside
Special Episode of Prime Minister’s Questions to be broadcast live on Saturday Night David Cameron has announced that all UK […]
EUSA not a shit show: claims sweaty middle-management worker
November 19th, 2013 | by Flipside
Today a sweat-covered middle manager for Edinburgh University Students Association called a press conference for anyone who cared, in order […]
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