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Commentary

Published on October 4th, 2017 | by Flipside

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5 Great Reasons to Defend Gun Rights Immediately After a Shooting

Some people died, so what? People die every day. Doesn’t mean they should take away our guns! Here’s five things those crazy liberals need to remember, even while the families of victims aren’t even through the immediate shock and grief of having a loved one needlessly slaughtered by gunfire.

 

  1. People die every day

 

This is so easy to forget. Those 59 people who died in Las Vegas? They could have died a million other ways – hit by a vehicle, leg cancer or choking on an overcooked piece of halloumi. A. Million. Other. Ways. Banning guns isn’t the answer, if we want to get to the root of the problem we need to tackle something more fundamental: human mortality. As long as humans are mortal, fleshy beings, this will keep happening, and there’s nothing we can do to stop it. Nothing.

 

  1. Now is NOT THE TIME to talk about gun control

 

Jeez Louise, you liberals really are something, huh? People DIED. And you wanna talk about ‘the law’? At a time like this? Wow. I really thought you were better than that. My mistake. Maybe give these grieving families FIVE GODDAM MINUTES to think about their brutally murdered loved ones before talking about ‘gun rights’ and ‘saving lives’ and ‘how to avoid this happening literally all the time.’

 

  1. EVER HEARD OF THE GODDAM CONSTITUTION OF THE GODDAM UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!?!?!

 

Some things are untouchable, and cannot be changed. Like the Constitution – that’s why you can not just ‘amend’ it as you go. The Second Amendment – the right to bear arms, which absolutely includes the government’s right to regulate said arms – proves that this 200+ year old document is as relevant now as it was in the 18th century when Britain tried to take our guns during the Revolutionary War. Be warned Brits: if you ever dare attend a film, concert, mall, primary school or any other potential battleground , we may be forced to obliterate you and whoever else happens to be around.

 

  1. This isn’t about guns – it’s about people

 

A gun is just a tool, much like most of the people who own them. If these maniacs wanted to kill people, they would find a way. If that guy in Las Vegas wanted to kill 59 people using a knife or common garden hoe, he absolutely could have done. Guns don’t kill people – people do. And that’s why North Korea absolutely cannot have nuclear weapons.

 

  1. Two thirds of all gun deaths are suicides!

 

That’s not even murder bro, these people wanted to die! And having a gun simply gave them the freedom to do so in a clean and civilised manner. You wanna take away their guns…or take away their freedom? You want people jumping off buildings instead, or throwing themselves in front of trains? You sick fuck. It sounds like you hate freedom pal, and if that’s not un-American I don’t know what is.

 

 

 

 

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