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Commentary

Published on October 11th, 2017 | by Flipside

0

5 Large Spherical Objects They Might Blow Up In The New Star Wars Movie

1. A Death Star:

Yes its unoriginal of us to say that, but tell that to the screen writers. They have essentially blown up death stars in three of the 7 movies now so who knows, they might just go for the 50/50 ratio and blow up one more.

2. A planet:

Again tell it to the screen writers.

3. Several Planets all at once:

See points one and two for joke, (yes this is very lazy of me to keep making the same joke, but it is also lazy of the screen writers to keep doing the same stuff and to expect that to create tension and drama)
4. Han Solo’s ego:

Yes Han Solo may be dead; however, his ego is obviously immortal and scientifically speaking perfectly spherical. Didn’t think about that did you Kylo Ren, ya dick, but attempting to destroy it there is a good chance the Empire/ First Order/ Republic/ Whatever name you want to give the same bloody thing, will use a large laser from another large spherical object.

5. The plot lines of the Star Wars Saga, these are remarkably spherical with each plot closely following the exact same plot of the other trilogy. Just with different people and different names who are all kind of related somehow. Call it clever story or call it lazy writing, whatever you say, these films are undeniably spherical but to reference this within the films would blow the whole thing up as they haven’t done that before and it would be meta as fuck but also kinda shit as they work well anyway so who knows what they will do but it will probably have some cool lightsabre battles Rae being badass Fin being hilarious and Po Dameron being a discount but still fun Han Solo and if you are annoyed about the lazy lack of punctuation and grammar in this last point please tell it to the Star Wars Screen writers if they don’t have to care then nor do I.

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