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Commentary

Published on May 3rd, 2016 | by Flipside

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City of Leicester Anticipates Spate of ‘Vardy-Boomers’ in February 2017

 

After Leicester City’s spectacular Premier League victory, with two games to spare, the city of Leicester is now anticipating the birth of a spate of babies in early February, 2017. The party that began last night is still continuing to rage in the Leicester, and is expected to continue for five more weeks at least, with thousands of businesses across the city shutting up shop so that they can ‘go absolutely mental’.

Locals reported feelings of ‘spiritual awakening’, ‘transcendental understanding’ and ‘wanting to fuck until they literally can’t move a muscle’, as soon as the whistle went at Stamford Bridge last night, confirming Leicester’s title victory.

Hospitals have reported a spike in the number of children with the names Cluadio, Riyad, N’Golo, Wes, Shinji and Kasper, with the child’s gender and ethnicity apparently not even coming into consideration.

Commentators believe that by 2025, Leicester will have the highest concentration of Jamies of any city in the world.

 

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