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Published on January 15th, 2016 | by Flipside

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Edinburgh student uses vast knowledge of construction to end Tanzanian school and orphanage crisis.

Felix Brockington-Shitehawk, First Yar student and self-proclaimed “drinking legend”, has recently taken the noble decision to travel to Tanzania this summer in order to single-handedly combat the country’s early-education development crisis by volunteering to build a primary school/orphanage (delete as appropriate). Using his expansive and detailed knowledge of construction, and  knowledge of the fact that basic building tools are yet to be invented in Africa, Mr Brockington-Shitehawk wisely came to the decision that he was clearly best placed to tackle the issue of global developmental injustice.

He commented: “Yah, it just kind of like came to me, when I was like watching Comic Relief in Need. They were all like we don’t have a school/orphanage and we’re reeaally poor, and I was like, I’m super rich and white, I can totally just build it for them!”

When asked where exactly Tanzania was he simply replied: “It’s like where Bob Marley’s from?”

 

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