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Entertainment

Published on February 24th, 2014 | by Flipside

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Edinburgh University student takes coffee invitation too literally

An Edinburgh University student had an unexpected experience this week after he took a friend’s invite to coffee far too literally.

When invited for a drink at popular Nicholson Street coffee house Kilimanjaro, Quentin Godfrey-Stephens, a first year philosophy student, immediately took a flight to Tanzania and waited patiently at the foot of the famous mountain of the same name.

“I am so out of touch with reality,” said Godfrey-Stephens, who stays at Chancellor’s Court, “that I thought my friend Niles wanted to have coffee on top of Mount Kilimanjaro.”

“It was a bit of an odd suggestion,” he admitted, “but Niles is always doing mental things like that. You should see his neknomination.”

Upon arriving at the Kilimanjaro National Park and seeing no sign of Niles, Godfrey-Stephens finally realised his mistake and became concerned.

“Father’s card covered the cost of the flights so that wasn’t a problem but I was rather worried about missing The Big Cheese on account of accidentally being on a different continent.”

“The lads go every week in our chinos and rugby club ties and I couldn’t bear missing out. We push past our inferiors on the dance floor and start an ironic mosh-pit to a cheesy pop song every single week – it’s fucking hilarious banter.”

Luckily, a return flight was available and Godfrey-Stephens was able to get his weekly fix of ruining Potterrow for everybody else.

Readers can rest assured that come Monday he will be browsing Facebook at the back of lectures as normal. No doubt he will drown out the lecturer by loudly boasting about his latest legendary antics and will generally act like a total fucking tool.

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