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Published on September 24th, 2014 | by Flipside

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EUSA to hold referendum to gain independence from Edinburgh University

In the aftermath of the Scottish independence referendum, Edinburgh University Students Association (EUSA) has vowed to hold a similar referendum to gain its freedom and become the first Student Union to be independent of its university.

EUSA President Briana Pegado is leading the charge in the run up to this referendum, which will be held “sometime next Tuesday”.

“I want a fairer EUSA, one which actually represents the students at Edinburgh University, and in order to achieve this we need to leave Edinburgh University.”

When asked how EUSA would continue funding its programs and students since the University provides EUSA with a huge annual budget of actual cash monies (we were unable to ascertain how much because it is all quite shady), Pegado replied:

“It’s quite simple really, we will use all the money we make in the Fringe to fund student activities; it’s not like we normally spend it on students so that’ll be a start. We have the money somewhere, I’m not entirely sure where since Kevin lost the bank details, but it is somewhere.”

She continued, “The prices of pints may go up and nachos may cost double, but it is all about the greater cause of a fairer student society.”

Sadly for Pegado and EUSA there will be large obstacles ahead, not least the requirement that 50% of students turn out to vote for the result to be valid. Sadly so far the predicted voter turnout is only eight (eight people that is, not percent). 

Big venues Teviot and Potterow have claimed that they would move their premises to London in the event of a Yes vote, stating that “to represent our students we have to go where they are, and that is London and sort of Surrey.”

Despite Pegado’s insistence that people “would not miss the Big Cheese that much,” even the notion of losing Potterrow has led to calls for her to be removed as EUSA President and banned from thinking.

With such ‘No’ sentiment loudly supported on twitter and Facebook (our most reliable news sources for such campaigns), it is difficult to see how the movement will be pushed through.

 

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