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Published on October 15th, 2015 | by Flipside

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Fourth Year With Limited Job Prospects ‘Seriously Considering a Masters’

Fourth year student James Shitbrick, who currently has no job offers and a limited range of work experience, has announced to friends this week that he is “seriously considering a masters” degree when he graduates this coming June.

Shitbrick, who is currently sitting on a ubiquitous mid-2:1 in his Philosophy MA (Hons), told friends at pre-drinks in his Marchmont flat yesterday evening that he’d always been interested further academic study, and doing the standard thing of getting a job in the city, and being a fat cat banker just didn’t appeal to him.

“I’ve always considered myself an academically interested person”, said Shitbrick, at this stage three Deuchars IPAs down, and putting his coat on ready for the walk to Hive. “We did this course on Wittgenstein last year, and I found it really fascinating, did a lot of fairly original research for the essay, and ended up with a pretty high mark; I think it was a 68 or something. It was then I really started to think that academia might be for me. Like I say I had always considered it though.

At the time of publishing, Shitbrick was spotted, latte in hand, in the library café, complaining about the amount of secondary reading he was having to do for his ‘Philosophy of Social Football” course. “I think they call it ‘secondary’ reading cause it’s secondary to going out on a big night out” he chortled, before repeatedly nudging his friend in the seat next to him, to the stage where it got irritative to everyone in close vicinity.

 

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