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Local

Published on January 19th, 2015 | by Flipside

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‘Horticulture’ ends in disappointment for green-fingered students

A keen group of landscape architecture and biodiversity students was left bitterly disappointed this weekend after mistaking a fledgling Edinburgh club night for an extra-curricular revision session.

Around fifteen enthusiastic gardeners arrived at Teviot Underground on Saturday night expecting a lecture and exam tips, but were instead faced with the launch party of brand new Saturday club night ‘Horticulture.’

“We assumed that any event with a name as terrible as ‘Horticulture’ would be something to do with gardening,” third-year biodiversity student Olivia Keith told Flipside.

“We were hugely disappointed as we expected an enjoyable evening.”

Landscape architect Ian Edwards admitted that it was not the first time such a mistake had been made:

“It reminds me of the time we went to The Potting Shed on Potterrow. We wanted to buy coursework supplies but all we received was ludicrously-overpriced cocktails served in jam jars.”

‘Horticulture’ is a brand-new club night which aims to revolutionise Saturday nights for Edinburgh students.

The “outstanding” venue, Teviot Underground, is best known for rubbish open-mic nights and as a place from which to source a seat during busy nights in the Sports Bar.

Organisers claim ‘Horticulture’ will offer value and variety to Saturday nights, although the £6 entry fee and the boast that Toploader’s Dancing in the Moonlight will be played at the end of every evening suggest that they don’t really understand either concept.

‘Horticulture’ is not to be confused with rival ‘The Big Cheese,’ which takes place in a bigger, better and cheaper venue.

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