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Local

Published on April 20th, 2017 | by Flipside

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Humanities Student Heroically Stays Unemployed

It may all be political doom and gloom, but one brave graduate is bringing back the sunshine. Despite his highly employable History of Art degree, recent graduate Jack Kinney has still not gotten a job.

“It’s not just a statement, it’s really a form of activism.” said Kinney, talking to us from his girlfriend’s flat, “There’s just so few jobs around these days, it really just boils down to the fact I think someone else probably needs one more than I do.”

Cutting an almost Christ-like figure in his dressing gown and simple, no-nonsense Primark underwear, it’s easy to see why this enterprising 22 year old has come to be known as a local hero. However, Kinney was quick to admit that his philanthropic crusade has never been easy.

“I just had so many job offers as an arts student, literally just swiping them off left and right. It got to the point where I was thinking – ‘I’m so employable, it feels almost cruel to deprive the opportunity from someone with less academic privilege as me’, y’know? Like STEM students?”

But don’t think that Kinney is just looking out for the little guys – he’s as feminist as they come.

“The gender pay gap is a nightmare. Without me taking up all those extra wages, maybe now the big corporations can take a good, hard look at affording equal pay. I might not even find a job until they’re paying women and men double equally.”

Faith in humanity: restored.

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