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Commentary

Published on August 4th, 2015 | by Flipside

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New trophy hunting shock as Donald Trump is shot by Dentist

Following widespread condemnation of the shooting of a thirteen-year old male lion by an American dentist (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-trending-33694075), a Zimbabwean dentist has shot Donald Trump in what appears to be a tit-for-tat revenge attack.  Trump had been America’s most famous joke politician, famous for his fine mane of straw-coloured hair.

Mr Trump appears to have been lured out of America into Mexico by the promise of being able to get on TV and say something profoundly xenophobic that would win him a few votes.  However, as he approached the camera, he was unaware that the hunter was lying in wait.

The loss of Trump’s iconic hair has left Americans in shock. “I can’t believe he’s gone!” wailed The Daily Show host John Stewart. “We’ll never have a presidential candidate as funny as this again.  Never!”

Hilary Clinton was similarly moved.  “Shit, now I might have to run against someone with half a brain,” she complained.  Meanwhile, a wave of sympathy has erupted online, with the hashtag “#comedy-haired-billionaire-lives-matter” trending on Twitter.  Conservationists also fear further bloodshed as surviving Republican candidates fight to take over the role of pack leader.

Some have cited the shooting of Trump as an argument for gun control, while others are less sympathetic.  “If Donald have gone to that interview brandishing two loaded Kalashnikovs, then he’d still be alive today,” said an NRA spokesman.

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