Published on January 11th, 2016 | by Flipside0
Sabbs pretend to be normal people for Christmas holidays
In an effort to increase participation in student politics, as well as make student politicians more relatable and less freakish, the EUSA Sabbs told us what they got up to over the Christmas holidays in the hope that it can generate good relations between them and the rest of the student body.
While attempting to identify the ‘Wellbeing genome’ at a top secret Swiss research facility, Jonny realised that the only genome he needed was the gift of love and caring. Following this, Jonny dressed up in a red suit, grew a white beard, and gave presents to every child in the world on Christmas Eve.
Whilst on holiday, Urte singlehandedly took down the capitalist governments of several South American countries and replaced them with socialist utopias. Currently, they top the list of Bhutan’s GDH (Gross Domestic Happiness) Index, but their economies have plummeted to the point where parakeets are an accepted form of currency. Swings and Roundabouts.
As part of his outreach program, Andy travelled to South Africa to catch some sun and to do some topless modelling for Vogue magazine for their ‘12 Labours of Hercules’ winter shoot. However, Andy upset some locals when his safari bus accidentally strayed into Southern Zimbabwe and he turned Cecil the Lion’s remaining relatives into a resplendent coat .
He is currently hiding from angry animal rights activists at 3 Lark Lane, Edinburgh, EG4 FUK3D.
She went home and celebrated Christmas with her friends and family. What a weirdo.