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Sports

Published on October 31st, 2013 | by Flipside

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Scottish rugby fan excited at chance of beating Japan

With the Rugby Autumn Internationals fast approaching, Scot Angus Macpherson, who at 6ft7 is literally a huge Scottish rugby fan, is reportedly “buzzing” at the idea of one Scottish victory this winter.

“It is so exciting, we play Japan in the next few weeks and in recent times we have never had such a good chance of winning. We might even score a try, can you imagine pal? Ever since Chris Patterson retired we have been shite, the man was a machine, if our points total was divisible by 3 then chances were he had kicked them all, like a boss man. Ye gotta hope when we play those Japanese, they might just be crap enough that we don’t look like total bawbags.”

When asked about Scotland’s chances against South Africa and Australia he laughed and said, “Fuck all mate, literally nae hope, damage control will be the play. Ye ken?” (Translation required – Ed.)

We also asked other students about the mouth-watering clash. “The game is well overpriced man, £5 for a student ticket, for that shite?” commented Kristy Ferguson.

“Scotland has a rugby team?” was all Dan Collins had to offer.

So with much hype surrounding this huge fixture in the rugby world calendar, who will prove triumphant in the great clash of mediocrity, Scotland or Japan?

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