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Politics

Published on June 11th, 2014 | by Flipside

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SNP to organise mass Harry Potter book burning

Following JK Rowling’s declaration of support for Better Together, the campaign to stop Alex Salmond’s ego-inflation, the Scottish National Party are planning a mass book-burning of all Harry Potter books in Scotland.

Speaking in the Scottish foods section of a Tesco, where she seemed to be failing to understand the difference between Vegetarian and Normal Haggis, Nicola Sturgeon said, “We think this an appropriate response, we must blind ourselves to the teachings of the traitors, no matter what form they take.”

Yes Scotland puppet leader Blair Jenkins was also positive about the move. “Look it’s been very successful in the past for other campaigns. I know it might seem a bit odd, but we’ve already started turning Scotland into a Police state, and we backed the Nazis in World War Two, so we’ve got form for this sort of thing.”

Better Together were asked for comment, but upon informing them of what was happening, a rapturous laughter engulfed the phone call.

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