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Commentary

Published on December 20th, 2015 | by Flipside

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SPONSORED: TOP 5 REASONS TO EAT DOMINO’S PIZZA ALL THE TIME

Flipside has just entered a lucrative partnership with Domino’s – here’s an article from our pizza-loving pals!

1: You’re lazy and disgusting:

As if everyone didn’t know it already, why not prove it to yourself by ordering one of Domino’s many delicious pizza-like options! For the full of effect, eat it alone in the dark, all in one go and don’t tell anyone. It can be your dirty little secret.

2: You hate money:

There’s SO MANY better things you could buy/eat for much less money than Domino’s costs, even if you have one of their many bizarre and intricate ‘deals’. Two-for-Tuesday is the greatest conspiracy since the moon landings.

3: You love the feeling of regret:

 Uniquely, Domino’s is the only food-chain that actually thrives on their customers feeling desperately sick for anything from 6-36 hours after eating their product, or getting, as it’s known, ‘that Domino’s feeling’: the piquant melange of sickness, fullness and regret where your whole soul is crying out for mercy after eating a whole pizza.

They say a large pizza is for 3-4 people, and they are lying. They know that no-one is ordering Domino’s to ‘just have a couple of slices’, probably without any garlic and herb dip, cause that’s embarrassing and no one does it.

4: You’re ‘one of the lads’:

You and the boys wanna have a lads night in, so it’s obviously Domino’s and FIFA , hair gel and Lynx deodorant and ‘banter’, where you talk about how women are terrible. Someone orders pineapple pizza and is ostracised from the group indefinitely. Finally as the night draws to a close you all have a good cry, and that is ok even lads need a cry.

5: You live right next door to a Domino’s:

Ah fair enough, you’re only human. We’d all do exactly the same.

 

 

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