Published on April 1st, 2014 | by Flipside0
Tab succeeds at satire
Edinburgh stood still at 12.03 today, as The Tab posted an article which resembled satire. The stunned silence was soon broken by jubilant cheering, bell tolling and widespread merriment. We at Flipside would like to pay homage to the comic genius of this superior publication, before laying down our comic hats forever.
Niall Moorjani, regular writer for our now defunct satirical outlet, gave this statement, “The Tab, that bastion of journalism, has just become the homestead of the comic intelligentsia. They have redefined satire.”
We caught a third year classic student for comment, “I know! I know! It’s all we could talk about in Greek. We all thought that old man farting in Aristophanes’ Frogs was bat-shit hilarious, but this Tab article has such witty juxtaposition of comic ideas that we were just blown away. The subtle and fruity hints of humour permeate every letter.”
Kirsty Haigh, mistaking the article for the Tab’s usual serious and cutting edge journalism, responded to the announcement that EUSA are to ban the Big Cheese for misogyny with a seemingly fully prepared parade in Bristo Square. Bystanders believed that this was also part of the joke, and the brilliance of The Tab, getting Haigh to – at last- join in the japery, as she was carried through the streets cheered on by Hugh Murdoch chained to her throne.
In other news, Professor Higgs has expressed concern that the Tab article may create a rift in the space-time continuum, because it’s just that fucking good.