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Commentary

Published on January 18th, 2017 | by Flipside

0

Weird Crush on Your Professor Back With a Vengeance

It’s the first week back and it’s happened again. You’d heard rumours, watched your weaker friends fall into the trap – but not you. Not until that tutor walked in. You know the one. With the hair and the face and the gravely sex voice.

 

We get it. They’re mature, intelligent, and have all the superficial power and authority the university can give them – plus no one ever made you feel that way about Ulysses before. What’s not to like?

 

Just as you’re starting to plan out possible scenarios that end in the two of you hooking up, Flipside is here to remind you that this is a totally rational response and something that could definitely happen in real life.

 

Whilst signing up to every course, seminar, workshop and office hour with their name on it might seem a bit keen, it is in fact a great way to show off all the interests you have in common and let them know you are the smartest, most studious person in the room. Because nothing says foreplay like repetition and painful persistence.

 

With this fail-safe plan in mind, there’s no doubt you’ll soon be summoned into their office to talk about a ‘special assignment’ that happens to take place at their studio apartment at nine o’ clock on Friday night. Anyone who tells you otherwise is jealous and standing in your way. You should probably get rid of them.

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