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Politics

Published on November 16th, 2015 | by Flipside

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West Turns To Tolkien’s Eagles For Aid.

Following the devastating and tragic events of recent days the leaders of the West have come together and reached a decision as to how they should respond: Ask the Eagles from The Lord Of the Rings to help.

Angela Merkel commented, “Well, the Eagles always seem to bail everyone out in Lord Of The Rings, so we figured that we should just ask them. I mean, they always know what to do, and if Gandalf comes with them then we are laughing.”

David Cameron was also on hand to add a comment, “Look, I know it sounds a bit crazy, but right now it is actually the most constructive and useful idea we have. We haven’t agreed on anything in a long time, but over the last weekend we have concluded that ISIS are bad and that the Eagles are good. Thus we should certainly appeal to them for aid before doing anything else. Didn’t you see how easily they dealt with the Nazgul, when saving Frodo and Sam on Mount Doom? Surely they can help us now. Even Corbyn cannot disagree with this plan!”

Jeremy Corbyn has indeed issued his support, and he denies that he is secretly Gandalf just because he has a grey beard.

No one has pointed out to the Western leaders that the Eagles aren’t actually real, but who are we to spoil their moment, they all seem so happy.

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